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Johannesburg Earth Summit : Fart Free Beans Not On Menu - Mr Methane - My Farts Blog

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3/9/2002 - Johannesburg Earth Summit : Fart Free Beans Not On Menu

Mr. Methane the worlds only performing flatulist expressed disappointment today at the lack of dialogue about Fart Free Bean Technology during the Johannesburg Earth Summit. Said Mr. Methane, " Tony Blair has raised the issue of Global Warming at the summit but there's no discussion about two of the major contributory factors towards global warming, Beans & Flatulence. One of the environmentally damaging things about beans is that after eating them, because of an enzyme, they make people fart, The result is the release of greenhouse gases into the atmosphere and global warming. This also actually causes infant malnutrition in some parts of the world because despite there being a source of protein available in beans, parents prefer babies who aren't smelly. There are beans which don't contain this enzyme but they're rare because they grow only in particular climes. It's fairly obvious that it could be very useful for humans to genetically engineer out the coding for that enzyme and test whether there's any problem in doing so. A Fart Free Bean could help save the planet by reducing green house gases while helping to feed the developed and developing world. It would also be a very good PR exercise for the much distrusted GM Food industry. I'm surprised that the likes of Tony Blair, Margaret Beckett, John Prescott and Michael Meacher haven't come out and really Let Rip about the benefits of developing a commercially available Fart Free Bean. I can see the Governments advertising slogan now, "Buy our Fart Free Technology: you can stick it up your Arse!"

Johannesburg Earth Summit. Official Website

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